HEAVEN AND HELL

HOME
********
Home...a place of constant longing.
A dream of white cotton clouds
and sea-blue skies.
Sometimes I wish I had wings so I could fly.
But I'm chained.
Chained by desire.
Chained by ambition...
How I wish I could fly...
__________________
HELLO
*********
Hello...
This is
the kid in me
speaking.

It is restless,
The fountain of
all my maladies...

Wants too many things...
Doesn't like being left alone...

Where is the corner,
it seeks to curl up
and sleep?
Where is the body,
it craves to hold
for warmth?

Its not a safe
place for a kid...
Too many evil
intentions...
Too much rape
of innocence...

The kid can
only cry...
Sometime I wishI could throttle it...
Smother the painful cries
ringing in my ears...
Sometimes I
just wish...
I could kill...
___________
DISAPPEARING ACT
*************************
Promises...
So many
promises to keep...
Why?

Didn't have to
be ...
bleak like this...
Hopes and dreams...
all falling fast...
diappearing like
cigarette smoke...

Sometime I dream,
of a fast car...
racing...
hair blowing
in the wind...
Exhilaration!
Then a crash...
and I can't feel
myself anymore...

Here and now...
everyone seems
so close...
Friends...
lost in the folds
of time's deceitful robe...

All that remains...
are snapshots
in the memory...
fading photographs
in the consciousness...
everything disappears...
We are all Houdinis...
The pain,
will be mine too...
______________
SUICIDE NOTE
******************
Life,
is all about waiting...
Some wait for love,
Some wait for money and fame.
Some wait for children,
Some wait for luck...
Some wait
for freedom,
some for revenge...
And some just wait to die...
Iv'e stopped waiting...
_________
Anirban Kapil Baishya(18/9/2007)